Coaching is both exciting and emotional. It's about acknowledging that there is something holding you back from being all that you can be and about responding to that knowledge by finding someone who can both help you identify, be a believing mirror to your potential and a guide to your future, and provide a swift kick in the rear end to get you out of your safe box. This is - perhaps - another reason why creativity takes courage.
Diane and I met in the morning to discuss my answers to the questions she'd emailed me in greater detail along with my hopes and fears. When we're being held back, it's always by a fear and most often that fear comes down to our need for acceptance and our fear of rejection. That's certainly true for me. Not fitting in has been an issue my whole life which only naturally leads to the question of if I'm already marching to a different drummer, what will happen to me, how much will my world shift, what will I lose and will what I gain be worth the pain of fulfilling the potential within that is yearning for exposure? My goal is to thrive, not merely to survive, and that means finding the answer.
After we met, I sat on a park bench and knit for an hour to process my thoughts and deal with my emotions. I had a gentleman walking by take a picture and yet when I downloaded the images, it was not there. How strange. After an hour of pondering and processing, I started working on my homework - which I'm still working on - and spent the next four hours walking in and out of shops and around downtown. When I got back to the B & B, I could hardly wait to kick off my shoes, put on my pajamas, and sip tea on the porch. YES YES ! ! ! !
As part of my assignment, I walked down Second Street to A Street and then over to the "blue house" between Third and Fourth Street. On the way, I passed this door in the middle of an empty lot. The frame is metal. I'm not sure if the door is wood or metal. The handle is there but not the lock. Above is the street address. It struck me how often we only see the closed doors and not the open walls in our lives.
Further along was this lime green bicycle complete with bell. Lime is - as most of you know - my favourite colour. As a child, my bike was freedom. When I was riding my bike, I could be anything, anyone, I wanted to be. My bike took me to places both real and imagined. I loved my bike. I've been thinking a lot about getting another bicycle although I haven't ridden in over twenty-five years. Why not?
The blue house is the space of Clear Light Optical. Diane sent me there to see all the different frames that Christopher has. He is not only an optician but he supplies frames for theater and most of the movie industry. I was to try on different frames as a way of seeing differently. And I did. Some made me laugh. Some were boring. This pair was a tweaking of who I am. The shape played up my eyes, mimicked my jaw line, and enhanced my face shape and the colour made my eyes sparkle. They opened up my face and the shape gave me a wider image. It's like hemming your skirt at just the right length. A small change; a big difference. I bought them.
Another part of my assignment was to try on some different styles I might normally avoid in a clothing store. I do that fairly often so I had to find something that was REALLY different. This skirt is soft and flowing and black which are all aspects I'm typically drawn to. It's also knit and figure hugging and yet, it looked great on me. I wouldn't have know that; I wouldn't have tried it on. Several of the other women shopping in the store stopped what they were doing to tell me how fabulous it looked. Isn't it wonderful when people connect like that? Perhaps we don't so much climb out of our box as push our box ever bigger - have open walls ? ? ?
These pants were far too big for me but I loved, Loved, LOVED the buttoned pleats along the side. I'm sure if they'd fit I would have bought them so perhaps this is good. What fun those would be to recreate although I'm not sure recreating is the direction Diane's guiding me in. It's more about risk and about listening to the fabric more than the piece. It's a unfamiliar and strange land; I don't even know how to describe it yet but I am excited to be moving there.
Talk soon - Myrna
Grateful - a believing mirror
In demonstrating prosperity you should praise and bless even minor evidences of financial improvement.
- Charles Filmore
... and perhaps praise and bless even minor evidences of creative improvement.