Wednesday, January 13, 2016

The Invisible Path

There must be something different in you if you want to make something work that didn't before. There is no better way to remain stuck that to repeat what has already been. The last thing you want is to relive the past all over again. Tomorrow should be new and improved - always. - Never Go Back: 10 Things You'll Never Do Again

It took three tries to get the thickness and the look of cording that I wanted for the black and white necklace. Close enough didn't work for me and - instead of settling - I pushed through and kept trying until I achieved the desired result especially since any deadlines I believed myself to be working under were entirely self-imposed, a thought I've pondered quite a bit this week.

 ... because if the writing itself doesn't satisfy you, it's unlikely the completion will.
 - Seven Steps on the Writer's Path

There are some things I absolutely have to do - like rent the suite to pay the mortgage - and some things I definitely want to do - like the morning hour in the studio and journal time - but there are no production quotas or deadlines and there is no schedule to hop to. How I develop my creativity is completely up to me and yet somewhere in my subconscious - or programmed into my DNA as my coach, Diane, put it - is this pressure to produce, in part because I have an amazing opportunity to really focus in on and maximize my creative potential. I don't want to waste it.

In the end, a man must sit down and get the words on the paper and against great odds. This takes stamina and resolution. Having got them on paper, he must still have the discipline to discard them if they fail to measure up; he must view them with a jaundiced eye and do the whole thing over as many times as is necessary to achieve excellence, or as close to excellence as he can get
. - E.B. White

I spent hours... and days... and an entire week... making pendants to hang on the black and white necklace. I was excited about the potential and the feeling that yes, I can make jewelry and most especially, I enjoyed quietly working in the studio with needle and thread sewing the cording into the shapes. It felt soothing, calming, positive, and forward moving. And all that is still good even though I eventually came to realize how tight the work was and how it failed to express the feelings I wanted to express. Yesterday, I made the decision to start over with one, large, organically formed pendant and we'll see where that goes.

Happiness consists in the full employment of our faculties in some pursuit. 
- Harriet Martineau

My goal isn't a finished necklace, or even an acceptable pendant. My goal is to maximize my creativity and to move in new directions. If I wanted to, I could make a quilt in a day, sew a two hour t-shirt, or copy my favourite jeans but that's not what I want to do. I want to be right here, in this moment, enjoying the process, exploring the possibilities, and reaping the benefits. I've been working with this photo of Audrey since November and while there's no finished necklace, there are several renditions and endless more possibilities and it still tickles. That in itself is good and enough.

Everything you want is on the other side of fear
- Jack Canfield

The technical part of me is very strong and - in retrospect - what I did was resolve the question of how will I attach these pendants first and then I built the pendants around that idea. That's a kind of fear, of waiting to get it right, a way of boxing myself in by choosing a method that appeared more likely to succeed and yet it was a box that ultimately failed. A better approach would have been to make the pendants and then determine how best to hang them. That would have stretched the part of me that I want to grow and that's where I'm going next.

I work best with boundaries and yet there's a fine line between a boundary that helps to move my work forward and a prison fence. I'm learning to leave spaces and to create flow. When I look at how I work and think now compared to four years ago when I started working with Diane, I'm not even the same person and yet so much of what I see is intangible. You can't take a picture of it and show it to a friend. Rather it's a feeling that you know for sure in your soul, a recognition that you are in a different place. The only step I know is the next step and the rest is an invisible path and, even so, it's a step I want to take.

Talk soon - Myrna

Grateful - starting over


  1. I really love this black and white post! (Do not get me wrong I am not a racist:) I am sure that we have to try something new all the time! It reminds us that we are alive and life is wonderful.


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